Our neighbors hate us. Well, “hate” isn’t the right word. “Loathe” is more accurate.
The strange thing is, I honestly have no idea why. Sure, we’re weird — my husband and I both ride motorcycles, and my yard is more tomatoes than flowers. Maybe that’s it. Anyhoo, these folks really, REALLY do not care for us. Bedelia in particular — she wouldn’t spit on me if I was on fire and she had a mouthful of gasoline.
So today, I was sitting on the porch swing, writing. My dog, a sweet Husky furbaby, was with me, just chilling on the porch. She was wearing her lead, because hey, she’s a Husky and I don’t want her running away.
Two of the neighbor’s grandkids wandered by, playing Pokemon Go. I stepped on Jinxsie’s lead to keep her on the porch. She’s super friendly, doesn’t even bark, but I know it would annoy the neighbor if she caught the kids petting my dog. So I kept her with me.
Bedelia was out on HER porch watching. She screamed at the kids, “Next time, you go out into the STREET! You do NOT walk past that DOG!” Then she darted back into the house before I could say, “Seriously, bitch, WTF? Did you really just tell your grandson to run out into the street — with his head down over his phone — rather than walk on the sidewalk past my house???”
She is certifably insane.
What about you guys? Any psycho neighbor stories out there in Electronland to share? Lay ’em on me in the Comments!